Best Johnlock Humor Fanfics

by cyerus

John is Sherlock's internet boyfriend - from CANADA.No one thinks he's real.

by feverishsea

After two weeks away, John finally texts Sherlock. He doesn't expect Sherlock to respond. He doesn't expect Sherlock to keep texting him. And he really doesn't expect things to spiral out of control so rapidly.

by oreganotea

“Every demon on record is described as either monstrously terrifying or breathtakingly beautiful,” Sherlock says. “I have never heard of a demon with a forgettable face and a propensity for ugly jumpers.”The demon looks down at his jumper. Okay, so it might not be the most flattering article of clot

by janonny

One of the first things John did was to write up step-by-step instructions on how to conduct a proper job interview before handing it over to Mycroft for his perusal. There were no kidnapping, deserted car parks or stolen therapy notes anywhere on that list.(Or the one where John returned from the w

by cellard00rs

To put off his meddlesome, matchmaking mother, John convinces Sherlock to play the role of his significant other. Unparalleled awkwardness ensues.

by worldaccordingtofangirls

Amnesia is just another case to solve. Piece together unfamiliar faces, reconstruct the old identity, the lost reality. A challenge that Sherlock could even enjoy. He can read people like books. The man with the silver hair is his boss. The tottering old woman, his landlady. The girl with the worrie

by coloredink

"You've written love letters," Sherlock asserted.(Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean, Russian, Polish, Japanese, Slovak, and Hebrew translations available.)

by earlgreytea68

The British Government accidentally clones Sherlock Holmes. Which brings a baby to 221B Baker Street.

by bbcatemysoul

Sherlock isn't really sure why John wants to shag him, but he's certain that if he's careful to behave properly about it, John can be persuaded to keep doing it.In other news, John is a good boyfriend and Sherlock is an idiot.(German translation available.)

by antietamfalls

Sherlock, a long-time sufferer of insomnia, is forced to share a bed with John at a hotel while on a case. To his astonishment, he finds that spending the night next to John helps him sleep and becomes determined to maneuver himself back into John's bed.

by what_alchemy

“You love your mother, Sherlock?”John watched the muscles in Sherlock’s jaw jump. He nodded in one sharp jerk. “Then we’re going to her party and making her happy.” John let out a resigned sigh. “As a ruddy couple, you bastard.”

by Blind_Author

John is an empath. Which isn't nearly as much fun as it sounds. Most of the time, it’s not even useful.

by Atiki

John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs).Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they're both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen.

by emmagrant01

They'd never talked about sex in the year they'd known each other. Well, that wasn't quite correct: Sherlock had never said a word about sex; John had bemoaned his personal dearth of it on many occasions.

by Mad_Lori

Sherlock Holmes never expected to live a long life, but he never imagined that it would end like this.

by etothepii

In Afghanistan, the supplies tell him when they're running low, and the cars always, always tell him when strangers have touched them, and John gets known as having a knack (paranoia, his men call it, but he's never missed a single car bomb) for keeping his men safe.

by 1electricpirate

Sometimes, only sometimes, when Sherlock is very far away and absolutely guaranteed not to return for at least three hours, John sits on the sofa and lets the tea make itself. In which John is (reluctantly) a wizard, Mycroft is (apparently) omniscient, and Sherlock is (surprisingly) oblivious.

by lifeonmars

John Watson is left-handed.He’s tried not to let it affect his life, but as any Lefty knows, that’s almost impossible.

by ivyblossom

“I had,” he said, “come to an entirely erroneous conclusion, my dear Watson, how dangerous it always is to reason from insufficient data.”-- Arthur Conan Doyle, The Adventure of the Speckled Band

by orphan_account

Sherlock Holmes has met exactly twenty-four Johns in his life. They have all been the wrong John. He's getting tired of waiting, staring at the inscription on his finger and wondering when his John will turn up, if ever.